IS SEX FOOD?

 

By

Ibn Abdillah As-sudaisiy Al-Iloori

In my research, I discovered that just like men, women's urge can be very dangerous if not tamed with halāl satisfaction. I wouldn't want to be detailed here. I granted an interview on Radio Kwara (North-Central Nigeria) after the launching of my book 'Halāl Sex and Intimacy', and a question of whether or not sex is greater than food was raised. I wasn't surprised that everyone who called in (men and women) all said sex is more than food. You can run around or even beg for food when things become so difficult. But you dare not beg for sex just anywhere. You can only do it with a lawful partner. I still have the recording of that interview. It was conducted in Yoruba language. So many people were able to follow it and they requested that we continued the programme the following week. This shows how important this topic is to the people.

Although self discipline is prescribed for both genders on intimate issues. But when the urge is at its peak only Allāh can guide the affected person (male or female) not to do the unthinkables, especially if it is a distance relationship or the affected couples live together, but they are careless of each other's plight in this regard. 

I think the best thing is to keep sensitising couples to communicate politely with one another on this matter. Some women know what to say, but they are shy to talk because they don't know what the reaction of their partners will be. Whereas, a couple need to be free with each other. It is a union of two individuals striving to attain paradise and not master-servant relationship. Couples should begin to discuss intimate issues with a bid to solve problems without contravening the shar'iah guidelines. 

The unholy pretense in the bedrooms can't help. Many married people are still practically single in their matrimonial homes because of lack of companionship. Sex starvation among couples is now very common in our society. In some cases, a man or woman would have to even beg his or her spouse before anything can happen. This is not Nollywood, I know of many confirmed cases. It may be that the erring party has a sexual related problem, if there is no communication, how will it be possible to discover the problem with a bid to solving it? Marital sex is a right and not a privilege. In fact, it is one of the most essential conditions for the solemnisation of a marriage. 

May Allāh guide us aright.