SACRIFICE OF MARRYING A MEDICAL DOCTOR

By

Ibn Abdillah As-sudaisiy Al-Iloori

I had a session recently with a couple where an issue came up regarding the sacrifice involved in getting married to a medical doctor and other professionals in medical related fields. My advice was that anyone getting married to a male or female medical doctor must be prepared for it. It is quite challenging, but highly reward if those affected can exercise patience.

In the first place, it is not easy to think that a female medical doctor will sit completely at home because we are yet to have many of them. As against the Ngige theory, even the male doctors that we have are not enough, yet many of them have "japared". Many of them are still expecting their visas to run away. Female medical doctors are needed in abundance by the Ummah and the society at large in those hospitals to help the sick and save lives. That is why their profession is very essential. They are the first among the essential workers in our society sacrificing their time and energy to cure diseases and ailments with the help of Allāh. 

May be a man aspiring to marry a female medical doctor can consider venturing into polygyny by marrying another woman or other women to fill some vacuums that would be created. But he must be capable Intellectually, financially, sexually, and mentally.

However, the schedule of duty a Muslim female medical doctor should be such that she will neither neglect her home (husband and children) completely nor affect her Deen adversely. Though it is not easy, our female doctors can be trained to achieve this. Some of them are actually trying their best in this aspect. Not every woman can be like Ummu Umm Sumayyah Mai , Dr. Asmau Hamzah , Dr.  Khadijah Tijani , Dr. Rasheedah F Famurewa  etc who have tried to effectively combine their professions with home management and still engage in some other beneficial da'wah activities.

In the same vein, women who are aspiring to marry male medical doctors too should be ready to sacrifice when it comes to time and attention. From the onset, they should moderate their expectations from their husbands especially those whose specializations are in tougher areas of the profession, such as Surgery, O&G etc. I believe every aspect of medicine is tough, but there are tougher ones. 

This also goes for other medical related professions like Pharmacy, Nursing, Laboratory Science etc. Anyone getting married to them would need to sacrifice alot. They are precious and should be given excuses and adequate support to excel in their areas. Then, they should not see what they are doing only from the perspective of making money or attaining worldly statuses. They need to watch their conducts towards their patients, spouses and purify their intentions in order to earn rewards with Allāh.

May Allāh guide us aright 

COMING SOON IN SHA ALLĀH